I recently spotted a number of Instagram posts with parents reflecting on how they want to give their children the joy of a nineties childhood, showing how they are prioritising simple, unstructured play, lots of time away from screens, and even swapping their digital TVs and streaming services for old televisions with video tapes where they can watch their favourite retro cartoons and films together as a family.
While I haven't yet traded my flat-screen television for a vintage model, these posts did make me realise how I've been giving my children elements of a nineties-inspired childhood without even realising it.
My children are only five and two, so thankfully I haven't yet had to face concerns over when to buy them a smartphone or think about social media use, but myself and my husband are of the same mindset of wanting to prioritise simple, slower-paced weekends where family park trips, unstructured play and dare I say it, even time to be bored, are the norm.
There is a lot of pressure on parents these days to always be entertaining the kids, taking them out to expensive soft play centres or attractions, or scheduling your weekends around clubs and classes, many of which are available to book from when they are as little as one year old. And while we are no strangers to our local soft play, we have also found that these places can be very overstimulating for all of us, and we come away after a couple of hours having spent upwards of £30 and likely with a new cold or virus in tow within the next few days.
Social media can often make us feel like we're not doing enough with our kids; seeing our friends or even content creators on constant days out or holidays can lead to a comparison spiral, but these are not things we would have expected in our own childhoods, and I feel that resisting the urge to overschedule our weekends and school holidays has actually been beneficial for all of us.
When I reflect back on my own childhood, some of my fondest memories are of being at home with my family, running around in the garden, playing Barbies with my sisters and doing activities like baking or arts and crafts. So it may explain why I've naturally leaned in to doing these things with my own children; we often take over the kitchen table with craft projects and science experiments, or bake cakes and cookies, and spend time outside in the garden, regardless of the weather.
Meanwhile, another family ritual that we have introduced in the past year is a movie night on a Friday evening, where we enjoy a casual dinner together in the living room and introduce our children to some of our favourite Disney and Pixar movies, for a relaxed start to the weekend.
There is joy in the simplicity and spending time together as a family, and while we all love going on days out to theme parks or other attractions, some of our best weekends in recent months have been when we've taken off any pressure or expectations and stayed closer to home.
According to Dr Sasha Hall, an award-winning senior education and child psychologist, this move towards a different parenting approach is becoming increasingly common as parents react to the overwhelm they may feel in modern life.
"Nostalgic parenting reflects a polarised reaction to modern parenting anxiety. We are living in a time where parents have never felt more worried, hypervigilant, and overwhelmed. We know that before COVID, the average age at which children played out independently was around 11, and post-COVID, this has dropped to around nine.
"Screen time now feels almost unavoidable. Many parents hold off on phones or iPads until 11 or 12, but beyond that, it becomes incredibly difficult due to peer pressure and social norms. Children are surrounded by screens, whether through gaming consoles, tablets, phones, or television," she shares.
"What millennial parents are responding to with nostalgic parenting is a longing for a simpler, happier, and more predictable time. A 90s childhood involved real play, physical movement, and social connection without constant digital oversight. Children played out on bikes, skipped ropes, played games like bulldog or street football, and parents knew where their children were by spotting a pile of bikes outside a friend’s house. I often describe it as the skipping rope era, a time when play was spontaneous, social, and embodied. We rarely see that kind of play now."
© Getty Images/iStockphotoThe child psychologist calls this trend "nostalgic parenting" and says that it is a way for parents to "protect their children from the aspects that feel most harmful, particularly excessive screen exposure, online peer conflict, and constant comparison." Meanwhile, she adds that it can also be beneficial for children to encourage them to develop new skills, such as emotional regulation, social skills, creativity, resilience and independence.
"Children learned to negotiate, problem-solve, take risks, and manage boredom. These are the foundations of mental well-being," she says.
Adopting nostalgic parenting doesn't mean you have to give up screens or all of the benefits of modern life, but trying to incorporate some of the simple joys that we enjoyed before they became a part of our daily lives, as Sasha explains: "The contrast between a 90s childhood and a modern one is striking. Parenting then involved more trust and freedom. Children were allowed to do more, explore more, and make mistakes. Today’s childhood is more structured, supervised, and screen-based.
"In a world that feels increasingly anxious and unsafe, it makes complete sense that parents are reaching back to a time that felt calmer, safer, and more connected. Nostalgic parenting is not about going backwards. It is about reclaiming what we know children psychologically need."
