Mariska Hargitay is keeping her late mom Jayne Mansfield's memory alive in everything she does. On March 10, the actress, 62, appeared at TIME's 2026 Women of the Year Leadership Forum in Los Angeles, which was also attended by HELLO!, and spoke of her memories of her Hollywood starlet mom.
Sheryl Lee Ralph, Olympians Jordan Chiles and Kelley O'Hara, and WNBA superstar Chiney Ogwumike were all speakers at the event which brings "visionaries and leaders from across industries for a series of conversations aimed at highlighting solutions and mobilizing action toward a better, more equitable world".
Mariska spoke candidly of the experience making the documentary My Mom Jayne about the famed blonde bombshell, who tragically passed away in a car accident in 1967 when Mariska was just three. As can be seen in the video above, Mariska particularly choked up when asked what she'd tell her mom Jayne if she were to see her now, tearing up before responding.
© Getty ImagesDuring her conversation with TIME as well when she was announced as one of their Women of the Year (a list that also includes Sheryl, Jordan, and Teyana Taylor, among others, this year), she noted all if the intricacies about her mom that she wanted the world to see.
The Law & Order: SVU star highlighted that she made the documentary to highlight the "multidimensional woman that she was" and all the ways they're so similar. "Her tenacity, her determination. I am so grateful that I got that from her."
Olivia Benson
© Getty Images for TIMEMariska is known for her work as Olivia Benson in the NBC series SVU, which she joked she had played for "79 years" – SVU began in 1999 - but when asked what Olivia had taught Mariska, she paused.
"I think what I brought to her is heart, empathy, and compassion," began Mariska. "But what she taught me is focus, fearlessness – feel the fear and do it anyway – and don't give up your femininity.
"You're allowed to be all of yourself; she taught me how to be a boss lady, and it's been beautiful to literally grow into that as I matured and progressed as an actor and a person on the show. I even noticed it with my voice, how my voice was softer and younger and more tentative with apology [in early seasons]. I don't have that now."
Robert de Niro's advice
Abbott Elementary star Sheryl was the opening keynote speaker, and she was partnered with Mel Robbins, host of The Mel Robbins Podcast, the number one podcast in the world. Together the pair spoke of the importance of women finding their own voices, and Sheryl shared how Robert De Niro's advice changed her life.
© Getty Images for TIME"I did a film with Robert De Niro called Mistress, and the great Robert De Niro looks at me and says, 'Whoa, you're a damn good actress, and that's too bad because Hollywood is not looking for you. They are not looking for the black girl… So you better climb that mountain and wave the red flag and let them know that you are there.'
"I thought about that so many times, and if I had been a different person, that could have really destroyed me," Sheryl continued. "But that's the great Robert De Niro who just looked me in my eye and said, 'They're not looking for you…' which means if my dream is going to come true, I am going to have to advocate for myself.
"I would have to get up every day and be prepared to climb the mountain and wave the flag, having done the work to let them know that I'm there. And I climbed the mountain, I did the work, and I am here and I am deserving."
Time as a melting ice cube
As motivational speaker Mel, 57, riffed with Sheryl, she gave some of the most important advice of the day: "Your attention and your time is the most valuable resource that you have. But it's like a melting ice cube on a kitchen counter. It will be gone like that."
© Getty Images for TIME"The question I want you to ask yourself is not what would you tell your younger self but I want you to time-travel to the wisest woman in the world, and I want you to ask the 90-year-old version of you, 'What should I do today? What change should I make today?'" asked Mel.
"Because the 90-year-old version of you knows she does not have time and she is going to tell you time is on your side, and it is not your enemy, but you better start respecting it. Start making decisions. You get to choose how you're going to go through this life, and you're either going to say 'God I wish I had, 'or 'Damn I'm glad I did.'"
Unlearning bad habits
"I love men, trust me. I'm crazy about a man," laughed Sheryl before she reminded the women in the room to be "better" than what men have taught us.
© Getty Images for TIME"For a few 100 years women had been – and some still are– under the thumb of the patriarchy, under the thumb of men," said Sheryl. "So when you think about rising when you've been under the thumb of men, sometimes you've learned men's bad habits and as women rise, I want you to remember to let go of some of what you've seen done by men."
"We will rise because there are so many women really doing the blessed thing – but when we get to the top, we must be better than what was before us," she added.
Sit down with the Goddess in the sky
© Getty Images for TIMEComparison is the thief of joy and as Sheryl said, only one person loses when we compare and compete, and it's you.
"When you look at somebody else and say, 'Why isn't that mine?' Well, because it wasn't meant for you. It was for them, it was theirs all along. What you've got is what the great Goddess in the sky gave you and if you want more, you need to sit down with the goddess and plan, plot, build, and move yourself towards your goals. Stop looking at everybody else's goals."
